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i gave her my heart but she wanted my soul. [entries|friends|calendar]
call_me_always

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[24 Nov 2007|09:35pm]
pineapple is what really makes me happy.
for sure :)
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[08 Aug 2007|03:00pm]
one good friends remarks with a rightfully angry "jesus dude, none of us know what to do with you.."
i, in my pride responded- "I've got news for you, none of you have to
cause i still run the show.
dont you forget it.
so i had to let some go..
dont think i dont regret it
cause i do and i dont
think im better off alone.
man, we could have had a big sound...
but i love to let my friends down."
fewer moving parts mean fewer broken pieces.

-david bazan
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[27 Apr 2007|02:34am]
home. i want to go home.




...fini
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control freak [15 Mar 2007|12:19pm]
you lose control when you hold too tight,
and turn your head long enough to let it bite.
cause faith left me staring at the ceiling through the night.
it's freaking me out.
and when I fell asleep, it plagued my dreams,
and 30 bits of glass had become my teeth.
they were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.
it's freaking me out.

you're freaking me out,
you're freaking me out.
and I keep running like a coward for the door,
but I'll never get out.
you're freaking me out.

you lose your mind if you lose control.
it makes you feel ashamed for the hearts you stole.
and now, your own heart's scared of an attack,
cause you can't give them back.
you're stressing me out when you prove me wrong,
you're wearing me out cause i've slept so long.

you're freaking me out,
you're freaking me out.
and I keep running like a coward for the door,
but I'll never get out.
you're freaking me out.

throw it all away,
i threw it all
and I threw it all away,
and the best part is not knowing just what I threw away.
i threw it all away.

you're freaking me out,
you're freaking me out.
and I keep running like a coward for the door,
but I'll never get out.
you're freaking me out.

you're freaking me out,
you're freaking me out.
but I keep running right back around for more,
cause I'm in love with my doubt.
it's freaking me out.
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[07 Mar 2007|09:18pm]
can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?!
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when i turn jet black & you let out your light- i live to make you shine. [06 Mar 2007|05:43pm]
you should never, ever, ever tell someone you'll love them forever. that they'll never ever love someone as much as they love you. and especially never, ever, ever mention marriage. GROSS.
2 comments|post comment

i'm scared, i swear, of you. [02 Mar 2007|10:44pm]
like in that movie theatre
when you whispered in in my ear.
'i almost didn't make it..this has been my hardest year.'
you've got that old map out now
and you've found the furtherest town
you hope that if you're lucky this is where you'll settle down.
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valentinesss dayyyy [14 Feb 2007|11:59am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

well, today is valentines day. instead of ranting and raving about how sad it makes me, i'd like to say that i'm not sad. i'm actually pretty happy. i'm going to try & chip the ice off my car, drive to the store- buy myself some flowers, maybe a bottle of wine, and definitely some more chocolates. [whoever thought that ONE coconut cluster was enough for the whole box was wrong. dead wrong.] i mean, don't get me wrong..who wouldn't want a secret admirer to send them a whole bouquet with a cute note attached on such a superficial holiday? but the thing is, i'd like a bouquet of secret flowers anyday. why would not receiving them only make me sad on february 14th? instead, i opt to be happy everyday. and if i want flowers, i just go and get flowers. and i loooooove flowers. so, whats the big deal? there isnt one. irregardless of whether my mom keeps telling me that i need to go out and fall in love with husband material. its like, take it easy. when it happens, it'll happen. and plus,'wise men say, only fools rush in.'. thanks.

in other news..well, there really isnt too much other news. its a snow day and i have a ton of mathematics homework to do. happy valentines day<333

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princess [12 Feb 2007|04:03pm]
yesterday was an amazing day. i wish i was still hiding in that fort. laying in bed all day is WAAAYY underappreciated. i'm just saying, its way better than coming home to realize that your brother has trashed your old bedroom where all your stuff still is, only to basically tell you its your fault for leaving things there. oh, and someone took my HUGE change thing that probably had an upwards of $50-70 in it. its not the money that bothers me, its the principal. i just want it back. it's just not nice. my feelings are hurt by the fact that other people dont care about my feelings. don't call it 'overemotional'. when you're an asshole, sometimes it bothers me. i wish i had that ability to just not give a fuck about anything. its not that easy for me.

i'm bringing LJ back in a serious venting way.

also, valentines day is wednesday. this year, i dont have a valentine. i love you, julia.
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[05 Feb 2007|11:53am]
[ mood | giggly ]

heres my post after the weekend. it was pretty fun- i headed out to turners and jackson and i stayed up until we were the last two standing-- then i got up, went to barre & had lunch with Jill [i love that bitch, seriously]. we had the WORST waitress EVAAAHHH but it gave us lots of time to chat & everything. i found out some interesting news & good gossip. it made me realize how hard relationships really are. even when you truely believe that two people want to be together for the rest of their lives, maybe THEY don't believe that. happiness is easy to fake but so hard to find. thats a scary thought.

the rest of my weekend basically consisted of a top secret hangout, which was so much fun. we saw two people having sex in a car. weirded out! i didnt think that people still did that anymore. it was pretty rad to just relax and not rush around and to not have a place to be. i think that maybe i liked it. i know i did.

right now, i'm waiting for class to start. i got to school like super early because i thought i had like a ton of stuff to do- but turns out i didn't. so i thought.. 'i guess it's time to bring LJ back'.


i miss my bests, which includes ashley. i wish she wasnt so far in worcester. i love that biiitttchhhh.

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truth [31 Jan 2007|12:49am]
the truth of the matter is...

honesty is the best policy.
life is A LOT easier when you're truthful with the ones you care about.

weird.

[morrison out.]
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[29 Jan 2007|12:16pm]
[ mood | awake ]

well i'm killing time before class. the good news is, i actually did the homework for both classes. the bummer is that i'm not too sure that i really have a single clue as to what is going on. LAAAAAAME. I'M SOOOOO LAAAAAAAAMEEEE. in other news, i still work at Applebee's. gross. just to get through it i remind myself that [as i reach into the ice machine and carry 20 pounds of the stuff over to bev area] that this is NOT the rest of my life, and that all this hard work and sacrifice [yes, sacrificing time with friends, family, and the nonexsistent love life] will pay off. that my focus on becoming more intelligent and my desire for knowledge is worthy of this much dedication. oh, and plus, i cant wait to make like a million bucks. killllerrr. (: but it's mostly to be able to travel and learn 500 languages...mostly.

and you know what i say?
i'm keepin the faiiithhhh.

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[24 Jan 2007|12:12am]
[ mood | glad the xmas tree is gone ]

work was... lame.
love life is...nonexsistent.
that is the one thing that makes me happy.
i'm interested in myself, my bests, and the fam.
oh, and the folk band.
maybe red wine.
but-
that's about it.
healthy?
i think so.
heterosexual lifemate- see you later.

theres my contribution to the lj movement for the night.

love love love is all you need.<3

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ANOTHER ONE>? GRAPHIC ARTZ? [23 Jan 2007|12:31am]
[ mood | anxious ]

dear lj,

is it true that you can't text message break up? i mean, i'm just saying. as long as the point gets across- does it really matter? i mean, i'm not saying that it's appropriate after like nine years of marriage.. (i'm ignoring the fact that i would be outraged by a text msg break up.)

whatevz. i'm so over that paragraph. moving on, the apartment is great. it looks really good. the only thing that i don't enjoy is the THERMOSTAT. that technology is far too advanced for any of us "college students" to understand. the thermostat=mortal enemy. or not mortal enemy.
whatevz.

P.S. WE NEED TO HAVE A HOUSEWARMING PARTY. room mates, unite. we have to get this shit going. its sooo not cool to have a housewarming party when you've lived somewhere for more than three months. and being cool is all that matters. i can't wait to verbalize these feelings since we're all sitting in the same room. lj is all that matters. we're soooo bringing lj back.

speaking of which, just in case justin timberlake is reading this: i love you. yes, this is a new discovery. but, a fantastic one, none the less. you should REALLY give brunettes a chance. i'm just saying.

also, i'm understanding the jtweedy obsess. that julia has. "is that the thanks i get for loving you? is that the thanks i get for telling you the truth?"

>>my other fav. quote of the month: "i couldn't get what i want so i took what wanted me. and i was making bad bets but when the odds look good you gotta play the hand you see- so if i leave right now..would you go with me?"

anyways. i think this lj post was good and long. TTYL.BYEZ.STFU.ILU.BFF4E.

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[08 Jan 2007|03:15pm]
[ mood | high ]

my livejournal is totally getting some action lately.

sadly, the only reason why my attention is here is because it's my mom's birthday & i'm sitting alone at her house waiting for her to get out of work. so i guess i'm a little bored.

westfield is fun! the apartment is coming along very nicely, and i'm pretty excited about it. i definitely need to buy some more decorations for the walls and stuff..which i'm excited about, too. being home kinda makes me wish i wasn't so far away..i guess its alright though. i want to try and make a plan to get home for atleast one whole day once a week.

also, i'm beginning to come around to the idea that im really attracted to being single. "boyfriend" is such a scary term. it makes me think of expectations, obligations and commitment. yikes. YIKES. live free or die.

thanks new hampshire.<333

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we're writing in our livejournals again! [02 Jan 2007|10:38pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

julie left me a comment saying that we should start writing in our livejournals again so i figured i'd take a break from stripperobics to type a little entry! i have a lot of new things going on in my life and its so refreshing. i feel so good. i moved back to westfield on the first of december- my apartment is gorgeous and HUGE and filled with two of the most amazing people i have ever met-- my bests, james and julie. its incredible. i STILL work at applebees, but i'm trying to fix that..its so ridiculous there, i really think i need to get out. or maybe just be there less. A LOT less.

obviously my personal life is going fabulous too, which is why i am currently sitting alone drinking an appletini and typing a livejournal entry. ha. hahahah. but whatevs. i'm not too worried about it, i'm definitely not looking for some sort of long term relationship anyway. i plan on staying away from those for a very long, healthy time. so long that it becomes unhealthy. i just want to have fun and see what happens. dating is scary, anyway. [insert more excuses to why you don't have a boyfriend..here.]

the nice thing about being out here is that i have time to clear my head. everything is fresh, new, and fun. i'm really enjoying life and having a great time. its not that i don't love my family and friends from home- i miss them like crazy. but being out in western mass is what works for me- so i go with it. don't fix it if its not broken!

well, carmen electra is waiting to teach me more about getting exercise by dancing around like a stripper. its silly, and totally not sexy at all. hahaha. whateverrr.

love you bitches! <3

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[22 Jul 2006|06:08pm]
just give up
and admit you're as asshole
you would be in some good company
and I think you'd find
that your friends would forgive you
or maybe Iam just speaking for me.



fini!
2 comments|post comment

[10 Jul 2006|02:04pm]
My ex is ...
ughh.. i'd say a douche bag.


Maybe I should ...
realize its time for bed

I love ...
my best friends, my family, and my boyfriend.

I don't understand ...
why i do the things i do sometimes.

I lost...
my marbles two months ago.


People say I'm ...
crazy


Love is ...
beautiful.

Somewhere, Someone is ...
humming the song "jessica"

I will always ...
be 15 minutes late yet obsessed with time

Forever is ...
something i look forward to

I never want to ...
be angry again

I think the current President is ...
a big fucking joke.


When I woke up in the morning ...
i was starving.

My past is incredibly ...
sad

I get annoyed when ...
i cant say how i feel.

Parties are for...
excitement

I wish ...
that i had a time machine

My dog is ...
fucking amazing


My cat ...
at my moms house.

Kisses are the worst when ...
your lips dont fit right

Tommorrow I'm going to ...
to make it to my classes


I really want ...
to be happy all the time

I have low tolerance for people who ...
are immature & liars or all around ignorant

If I had a million dollars ...
you would never see me again.



JULIAZZZ:
my name: Fucking Cheerleader

Where did we meet: the bees (at least its good for something?)

Take a stab at my middle name: LiN <3

How long have you known me: fooohheevvuhevahevah

When is the last time that we saw each other: Valentiness Day! Right before/after we made out?

Do I smoke: thepatchthepatchthepatchthepatch

Do I drink: only on the finest of occasions with the classiest of company :)

What was your first impression of upon meeting me/seeing me/messaging with me: ugh. shes hot. im either going to have to hate her or love her.

Do I have any siblings: William

What's one of my favorite things to do:masturbate. allll the time.

Am I funny: hah. hahaha. hahaha.

What's my favorite type of music: billy joel? too bad hess olldd

What is the best feature about me: your gorgeous face and titties.

Am I shy or outgoing: OUTgoing

Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules: do i have to answer this? youre a "celebrity"

Do I have any special talents: making me hot

Would you consider me a friend/good friend: sistah from anothhaa mistaa

Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, ahippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else (what): all of the fucking above

What is a memory we have once had: margaritas? crazy bitches? GRIV? GDISSTEFF? UGLY?

Have you ever hugged me: dryhumped but never hugged.

Do you miss me...do you think i miss you: yes. and yes.

What is my favorite food: pasta, bread, and anything you can cut into miniscule pieces

Have you ever had a crush on me: everyday

If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be: Cheertitleader

What's your favorite memory of me: you me and the ugly one driving our asses from paper street to northampton to talk about how much we loved porn and hated me****ns

The person i like right now, what color is their hair: i dont know, its long and fab

What is my worst habit: See "favorite food"

If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing would I bring? we would take the Ugly, and make him swallow all the necessities for making margaritas

Are we friends: didnt I already tell you that were sisterS?
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[10 Jul 2006|02:03pm]
001: Name - Jessica

002. Nickname - Cheerleader

003. glasses or contacts: glasses.. i should really get another pair.

004. Zodiac Sign - leooo

005. Female or Male - ladyface

006. Elementary School: Ruggles Lane.. Barre HOLLA!

007. iPod - i'd like one, please

008. How many buddies on your list: too many

009. Screenname: jessicalin513. dont use it unless i know you. please. <3

010. Hair Color - dark brown

012. Hair Long or Short - longg

014. Eye Color: blue eyessss

015. Are you health freak - i like veggies sometimes.

016. Height - 5' 2.

017. Do you have a crush on someone - uh huh.

018. Do you like yourself - OBV

020. Think your awesome? - basically.

021. Piercings - septum, belly, ears

022. Tattoo - yes. duex.

023. Righty or Lefty - right sideee


___Your 'Firsts'___

024. Surgery - my breasts. hahahah JOKES!

025. First piercing - ears

026. First best friend - amy

027. First Award - archery

028. first sport- t-ball bitches

029. First pet - stripes <3 RIP

030. First vacation - maine

031. First Concert - fake beatles

032. First love - jackson tyler

___Favorites___

033. Movie - boondock saints.

034. Favorite tv show - that 70's show

035. Color - white

036. Music - oh you know.

039. Drink - diet coke

040. Body part not on the face (on a boy/girl) - hands

041. Sport To Play - tennis

042. Favorite piece of clothing - i look fruity in my pink tee <3

043. Brand Of Clothing? - forever21

044. What do you sleep with? pillows, blankets, once in a while a boy<3

045. Favorite School - ?

046. Favorite Animal(s) - im bound to be a "cat lady."

047. Favorite Books - Another Bullshit Night in Suck City. READ IT

048. Favorite Magazines - trashy ones that tell all about celebrities.

___Currently___

049. Eating - soon to be veggie nuggets and baked french fries <3

050. I'm drinking - rockstar

052. I'm about to - go and make my lunchhh <3

053. Listening to - tom petty

055. Waiting For- the oven to be heated.

056. Watching - this survey? what am i, superman? how many things do you want me to be doing at once?!

057. Wearing - my fab. silver earrings, grey tee, white belt, my fav jeans and zebra slip on shoes.

___Your Future___

058. Want Kids? - probably.

059. Want to Get Married? - yes, please.

060. Careers in Mind? dominator of the business arena

__Which is better with the Opposite Gender__

068. Lips or Eyes - ohh you know, both.

069. Hugs or Kisses - both

070. Shorter or Taller - is baller an answer here?

072. Romantic, Spontaneous or larma - rom/spon. combo

073. nice stomach or nice arms - arms

074. Sensitive or Loud - a little of both

075. Hook-up or Relationship - i'm not a playa i just crushhhh a lot

076. Sweet or Caring - caring

077. Trouble Maker or Hesitant? - cause a rucus motha fuckaa


___Have you ever___

078. Kissed a Stranger - oh boy

079. Drank bubbles - no. thats silly.

080. Lost glasses/contacts - obv.

081. Ran Away From Home - not for real

082. Broken a bone - the ankle :[

083. Got an X-ray - uh huh

084. Broken Someone's Heart - heartbreaker specialist.

086. Turned Someone Down - obv.

087. Cried When Someone Died - what kind of question is this?

088. Cried at school - probably

___Do You Believe In___

089. God - yes.

090. Miracles - uh huh

091. Love at first sight - yesss

093. Aliens - yess

094. Magic - yess

095. Heaven - see you there. or maybe not.

096. Santa Claus - awww cute.

097. Sex on the first date - only for money

098. Kissing on the First Date - aaahhahaha probably.

099. Angels - yesss. <3

___Answer Truthfully___

100. Is There someone You Want To be with right now: ohhh boy. <3
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jamesiee sooo cutteeee [10 Jul 2006|02:02pm]
Jessica Lin 513: i hope that i find an online survey to occupy some of my time
Mattson02: hahahaha
Mattson02: if you find a good one let me know, i'll probably be taking quizzes to tell me what Buffy the Vampire Slayer Character I am most like
Jessica Lin 513: HAHAHAHAAAAA
Jessica Lin 513: here: we can do these about each other and post them on our myspaces'
Jessica Lin 513: do it
Jessica Lin 513: thats just an option, im not sure if we're that bored yet
Mattson02: i'm hard just thinking about it
Mattson02: I already copied and pasted it






1. who are you? Jessasaurus

2. are we friends? like the best

3. what is ur favorite color? my fav? um, white i guess. dont put me on the spot!

4. How have I affected you? made me realize big titties are okay.

5. What do you think of me? i think you're amazing.

6. What's the fondest memory you have of me? the time i kissed you on the mouth.

7. How long do you think we will be friends? until you get hate-crimed.

8. Do you love me? DUHHH <3 you're killer.

9. Do you have a crush on me? yours is the only d i would s.

10. Would you kiss me? only on the mouth. wait, thats a lie.

11. Would you hug me? my box would hug your rock hard cock.

12. Physically, what stands out? your style. its amazing because its laid back yet classy.

13. Emotionally, what stands out? umm. the fact that you laugh when you're happy or extremely uncomfortable.

14. Do you wish I was cooler? whatev james. you put n/a

15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I? 10000101010000

16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it. the ugly one. because you really arent. and we call you that because you have a bad self image that no one else sees. wow. thats kinda messed up.

17. Am I loveable? def.

18. How long have you known me? since i crashed the party at the bees

19. Describe me in one word. hilarious

20. What was your first impression? "i dont know if hes gay or straight."

21. Do you still think that way about me now? no. i mean, i know youre gay. but ask me if that stops me from having dreams of your body. ASK ME

22. What do you think my weakness is? that you want a boyfriend real bad

23. Do you think I'll get married? yes. after i do.

24. What makes me happy? you dont need to be happy, you just need a boyfriend.

25. What makes me sad? well, you get sad and terrified when julia and i fight.

26. What reminds you of me? TGS. and everything else.

27. If you could give me anything what would it be? my virginity.

28. How well do you know me? i could probably finish your sentences. [so what if they all end in SOOOO GOOD!]

29. When's the last time you saw me? bitch, please. like forever and 3 days ago.

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't? yeah, i had a hard time telling you that you could never have jason. oh wait, no i didnt.

31. Do you think I could kill someone? maybe if no one would ever find out.

32. Do you miss me? YESSSSS

33. Do you think i miss you? i know its true. <3

34. Are you going to put this on your MYSPACE and see what I say about you? well, its memorial day and we had nothing better to do so we sent this to each other. sooo.. whatever that means.
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